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A Valentine’s Day Message to Fellow Caregivers

By Guest Blogger February 13, 2014Pearls of Wisdom Blog

I recently gave some advice to the wife of a newly diagnosed cancer patient. My dear friends at PearlPoint requested that I share this advice with other caregivers.

The patient is always right.

As we caregivers begin the treatment journey along with our loved ones, it is important to always remember that they know best how they are feeling. Let them be in control. Let them make decisions. Give them space to think.

Consider the many medical professionals who will offer direction and opinions; add in all of the family and friends who have researched the unlimited array of new drugs and treatment options plus your own loving research and inputs and, wow, you can easily see how overwhelming this might be to the patients WHILE they are having strange chemicals introduced into their bodies. We as caregivers simply cannot feel or know what the patients feel so let them be in charge; let them tell you before you ask.

Hug them, comfort them, and love them as you let them have the final say in as many decisions as possible. It is vital to their well-being to be in control. Besides, you will have more than enough to do. I have lived it, I have learned, and it is my privilege to share this advice with you.

I wish everyone peace and happiness this Valentine’s Day.

Guest Blogger

Author Guest Blogger

PearlPoint Nutrition Services often features guest bloggers to write on a variety of topics related to cancer, nutrition, and survivorship. If you have an idea for a blog or would like to contribute to Pearls of Wisdom, email

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Join the discussion One Comment

  • Diane Beck says:

    I just ran onto this site and wished I would have found it a few years back.

    I am a caregiver, taking care of the medical needs of my husband. We have been on a heart care journey for years and the past few years have been a member of yet another club – cancer. A club that no one wants to be a member of but it knocks on your door and you are granted membership like it or not.

    Many times I have asked why – – why two major health issues instead of one? It is a navigation journey determining just which health concern is rearing its ugly head this time. The combo is almost like tracking a spreadsheet. The Dr. cards take up a good portion of the refrigerator door surface now, used as a quick reference and grouped into which illness.

    However, each time I go through that door of “why’s” I immediately reflect on his treatment days at the Cancer Center. Just sitting there in the waiting room, every day for 44 days for radiation, one sees all to clearly the pain of others that have membership in this club as well. When we would leave each day and travel home, we would reflect on just how blessed we really are. There are so many others suffering and we are powering through it. Surviving the day.

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